These are hilarious. You will definitely get a few laugh out loud guffaws. They are all from different sources on the net and are only as dirty as your mind and bad grammar. From the REIN site.
Complaints from Renters
1. I want some repairs done to my oven as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
2. The neighbor’s 18 year old son is continuously banging his balls against my fence. Not
only is this making a heck of a noise, but the fence is now sagging in the middle.
3. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is running away from the wall.
4. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the roof of the outside toilet and I think it
was bad wind the other night that blew them off.
5. I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
6. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is cleared.
7. Would you please send a man to repair my spout, I am an old age pensioner and need it
bad.
8. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 5:30 his cock
wakes me up and it's getting too much. Its all right when my husband is on day-shift,
but when he's on back-shifts or nights I get it several times a week from Mr. Docherty
next door and at my age it's too much.
9. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and
dangerous.
10. Our kitchen floor is very damp, we have two children and would like a third, so will you
please send someone to do something about it.
11. The toilet seat is cracked - where do I stand?
12. I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would be pleased if you could
do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night.
13. Please send a man with a clean tool to finish the job and satisfy the wife.
14. I wish to lodge a complaint against my neighbor in 211. When I get undressed at night I
can see him looking in my window with binoculars. Do I need to pull down my own
shades?
15. When I'm in the shower I turn on the water and I get hot. Could some nice repairman
fix my pipes so I don't always get hot?
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